Re-establishing Rhythms
This summer I took up rowing. I hadn’t thought about the sport since I stood bundled up on Putney Bridge almost a decade earlier, watching the start of the Oxford-Cambridge boat race. I remember being impressed by the rhythm of the oars in perfect synchrony as the boats glided effortlessly along the River Thames. So, when an opportunity arose to take lessons on Lake Austin, I jumped at it.
Patience. Balance. Rhythm.
What I thought would be a hop-in-your-boat-and-let’s-go experience, turned out instead to be a slow lesson in patience, balance, and rhythm. I soon realized that my harried attempts to pull harder with my arms to gain speed, ultimately upset my balance and slowed me down. Equally, if I got distracted and didn’t stay present to my breath or to the moment, I would lose my rhythm and risk tipping the boat.
After several lessons at daybreak, with the sun rising over the city skyline, I finally hit my stride. The sound of the seat sliding, oars locking, water swirling, and boat gliding, became its own kind of music and I was moving to its beat. It was then that I realized that my self-effort had finally given way to a rhythm I merely responded to.
Anticipate change and adapt with a new rhythm.
Seasons follow rhythms too: summer giving way to fall, light giving way to dark, and we are not left unaffected. We notice the shorter days, the cooler evenings, our calendars filling up with countless commitments. We might feel nostalgic for the slower days of summer, the fewer choices, the extended time to play. But life is rarely, if ever, made up of all one thing and so we anticipate the change and adapt with a new rhythm.
I’ve spent the past couple of weeks getting my newly-licensed driver comfortable with her route to school, setting up carpools for soccer, and co-ordinating my work schedule around those of my three busy daughters. As the new rhythm gets underway in our home, it still feels clunky. We’re not all pulling at the same speed and there are many distractions competing to pull us off course.
Life is best lived at the right rhythm.
If rowing has taught me anything it’s that life is best lived at the right rhythm. And so, as we transition into a new season, I’ve been practicing the techniques I’ve learned on the water.
Breathe deeply: Transition points can feel stressful. Don’t neglect the power of a few deep breaths to self regulate and set your course, knowing it can be adjusted at any time.
Stay in your lane: Don’t compare your rhythm for the fall with anyone else’s. Do what works for you and your family and still allows for a margin of rest.
Be present: Check in with yourself and your family regularly to see if the rhythm you’ve set is working for everyone. Check out of all the distractions, especially those that are out of your control.
Relax into the new rhythm: Striving and self-effort rarely propel us forward in the desired direction. Start from a position of rest and self-validation and return to it when you feel off-balance.
Enjoy the glide: There is no guarantee of a smooth ride. Reap the rewards when you do find your stride and remember the resilience you’ve already acquired when all you need is to stay in the race.