#create

I noticed something about myself over the winter break. Something I’ve known, but never put to words, because it’s not necessarily a helpful trait in a world that values efficiency. Nonetheless, here it is: whether I have a house full of people or just one person sitting in another room, I find it very hard to get things done. I might be able to do mindless tasks like laundry, but when it comes to thinking or planning or being creative, it’s like my brain says: “Sorry, not yet!” - almost as if it’s waiting for everyone to leave.

Which is exactly what everyone did last week: my mother in law got on a plane back to South Africa and the girls went back to school. After the initial feelings of sadness, an entirely unexpected switch flipped on in my brain and with it came a surge of energy. In two days I cleared out the cupboards I’d previously only been staring at, my mind processed a myriad thoughts in the silence, and I finally got the urge to write.

As an introvert, I wasn’t entirely surprised by this response, because the stereotype is that we don’t really like being with people and we get energized by time alone. While the latter is true, I genuinely do like people and am infinitely curious about their thoughts and perspectives. I’m also acutely aware of their presence in my home and my desire to be with them, which left me wondering if it was possible to be both introverted and highly relational. 

My experience told me that it was, so the real lesson I’ve learned is to remember not to even try and be productive when my house is full. There will be time for thinking and planning and doing, but when my people are there, just relax and be present. Read a book, soak up the slower pace, let go of tasks and performance, and spend time together just being. Whether it’s creating connections, memories, or spaces to unwind, that’s what we’re doing when we’re not busy doing.

Which brings me to our family word for the year that we came up with before everyone went their separate ways: create. Everything from creating beauty and music to asking God to create in us a pure heart - it was a word that felt big and promising and full of joy. 

Happy New Year!